On a brutally hot August day in Greece, my husband Norm and I slowly climbed the steep, ancient steps toward the temple at the Oracle of Delphi. Our guide, Helena, walked ahead of us, easily and without effort. She was a beautiful, well-educated wife and mother of a 16-month-old son. Her ever present smile, lovely hazel eyes and gracious demeanor reminded me of our Rebecca. Helena appeared to have it all, as she spoke knowledgeably about the historic ruins we saw before us.

On our way down the same stone steps, she and I found ourselves alone, ahead of the group. The inevitable question was asked: "Do you have children"? "Yes," I answered. “Brett, our son, and Susan have three children. Our daughter, Rebecca, died at the age of 30.” "What happened"? Helena asked. “Was it an accident? Was she ill? I’m so sorry.”

At that moment, I decided to share my daughter’s story with Helena. I told her about Rebecca's beauty, wit, intelligence, elegance, humor, outrageous laugh and devotion to her family and friends. I told her Rebecca lost her lifelong battle to depression and bipolar disorder. Helena asked when Rebecca had been diagnosed and what type of treatment she had. She asked how Rebecca managed to work and live her life while fighting the disease. It was clear that Helena had a personal interest in my daughter’s story.

I recounted to her that Rebecca was in her early 20s when first diagnosed with bipolar disorder, that she received excellent care and continued to live alone and work as an editor and writer for a prestigious magazine in Chicago. With tears in my eyes, I told Helena how desperately Rebecca wanted to be “normal” … how she tired of always trying to stay one short step ahead of the disease … and how difficult it was to be thought of as “having it all,” while silently suffering. Helena stood still on a narrow stair, turned, looked directly at me with blazing hazel eyes, and said, "Depression steals your life, your heart and your soul. Depression steals the sun. It is hard to fight and still live."

Continue reading 'Rebecca's Dream'